it's a COLOURFUL life i'm living.

Tuesday, November 28, 2006 Y 8:28 AM

ytd seems to be a terrible day for me. firstly, i was sick... from fri till now le... everytime i sick will take veri long to recover. haha! noe y.. cos i hate to see e doctor. lol! i noe chi ku e shi wo zi ji... but.. hmm... haha!

then cppa that time gt a second blow. dun tok bout it le. i was sad... but didn show out. cos everytime when im realli sad... i will hide the sadness n try to be happy e. but when im nt sad... ppl will think im sad... it's wierd. jus like ytd... i was sad but didn realli show out... maybe onli pohloo can see im sad bah. cos i also dunno y... jus like to hide my feelings.

hiding my feelings for me means... showing e opposite of myself... when im smtimes happy means im sad... but i dun wan sadness to control over myself. n when i like someone means i hate that person. haha! no lar... aniwae toking bout liking someone... ppl say if u r in love u will have a special feeling. how does tat feel huh? i think i have been suppressing that feeling. haha! jus like in sec sch, when i gt a crush on that person i will try my best to hate that person, jus to make myself dun like tat person. im jus wierd lor. but sometimes suppress too long le will giv up n maybe explode e. haha! n my horoscope for this wk say... i will be in a state of loss... gan qing shang hui hen mi ma... dunno whether im treating that person as a friend or as someone i like... haha! so funni. lol! horoscope smtimes realli cannot believe e.

sometimes, u see e real me is nt actualli me. haha! i dun realli like to say out my inner feelings to ppl e. tat's aquarius bah... how i wish i realli gt a soulmate hu can realli listen to me e lor... but then i think it's tough. ppl wont wan to involve themselves into other ppl's problems... and create more worries for themselves. i think onli counsellors hu gt paid will do such jobs... cos they are PAID. haha!

im jus too sick in my mind now... haha.. so rather crapping thru.... lol!

xia signing off!